A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
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- Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
- If the world should blow itself up, the last audible voice would be that of an expert saying it can’t be done.
- People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.
- Beautiful young people are accidents of nature, but beautiful old people are works of art.
- The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education
- If you call a tail a leg, how many legs has a dog? Five? No, calling a tail a leg don’t make it a leg.
- Books serve to show a man that those original thoughts of his aren’t very new after all.
- If I had eight hours to chop down a tree, I’d spend six hours sharpening my ax.
- Thought and theory must precede all salutary action; yet action is nobler in itself than either thought or theory.
- You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.