Thought and theory must precede all salutary action; yet action is nobler in itself than either thought or theory.
Men live in a fantasy world. I know this because I am one, and I actually receive my mail there.
I gave a party for time-travelers, but I didn't send out the invitations until after the party. I sat there a long time, but no one came.
As if you could kill time without injuring eternity.
Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
If the world should blow itself up, the last audible voice would be that of an expert saying it can't be done.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
Science is good furniture for one's upper chamber, if there is common sense below.
A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
The surest way for a pedestrian to live longer nowadays is to buy himself a car.